What Is Something Funny I Can Call Shreks Penis
10+ Moments Proving 'Shrek' Was Really Not For Kids
These days, Shrek is hailed as one of the defining films that helped reshape movie animation for the new Millenium. It's unequivocally beloved by kids (and adults) of all ages.
But as so often is the case with DreamWorks animated classic, an objective step backward reveals a lot. Here are 10+ moments proving Shrek was really not for kids at all.
When Shrek makes a penis envy joke about Lord Farquaad in *Shrek*.
When Donkey and Shrek first embark on their journey to Lord Farquaad's castle, they can't help but stare in amazement as they approach the massive phallic structure.
It's at this point that Shrek turns to Donkey and asks "Do you think he's compensating for something?"
Puss in Boots getting busted for 'possession' in *Shrek 2*.
After an unfortunate run-in with the castle guards, Puss in Boots is thrust against a wall and searched without his consent.
The guards procure a Ziploc bag filled with catnip from his person, to which Puss exclaims "That's not mine!"
The ample amount of "ass" wordplay persisting throughout that franchise.
While attempting to rescue Fiona in the first film, Shrek realizes that Donkey is in trouble and turns back in order to help his friend.
When Fiona demands to know the reason for his premature departure, Shrek responds "I have to save my ass." An ass is just another word for a donkey.
The Magic Mirror's description of Snow White in *Shrek*.
While presenting Lord Farquaad with his eligible bachelorettes, the Magic Mirror says "although she lives with seven other men — she's not easy."
That joke is a little misogynistic by today's standards, wouldn't you agree?
The dronkeys in *Shrek 2*.
I'm not saying that Donkey and his dragon-paramore Elizabeth don't have cute babies, it's just that when you stop and consider the logistics it becomes a little bit frightening.
A donkey and a dragon mating; how would that work?
When the wooden toys sing the "Welcome to Duloc" song to Shrek and Donkey in *Shrek*.
When Shrek and Donkey first cross the threshold of Duloc, they notice a wooden animatronic toy positioned at the entry to the gates.
As it starts to sing, it cautions visitors to "please keep off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your...face!"
OK, Shrek — we get it.
In *Shrek 2*, the Big Bad Wolf is reading a magazine titled "Pork Illustrated."
If you take a look at the front cover, you'll notice a pig pictured in a bikini.
This is a clear (and admittedly pretty funny) allusion to the infamous and controversial Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.
The lyrics to the Fairy Godmother's "Holding Out For A Hero" in *Shrek 2* were incredibly sexualized.
I admit that I have a bit of a gutter mind when it comes to these types of things.
But you can't tell me that when she sings "Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed? Late at night, I toss and turn and dream of what I need," that she isn't talking about a booty call.
When the maidens of Far, Far, Away were smitten with Shrek's manhood in *Shrek 2*.
In Shrek 2, after Shrek is transformed from an ogre into a human, his pants (now too big) fall down around his ankles.
The camera then pans to a group of young women who are clearly checking out his undercarriage and giggling with approval.
Lord Farquaad's brutal torture of Gingey (the Gingerbread Man) in *Shrek*.
The scene begins with Farqaud's executioner, Thelonius, submerging Gingey's head in a glass of milk — a subtle but clear allusion to being waterboarded.
Add to that, he snaps Gingey's legs off before his very eyes and taunts him with his own limbs.
When Lord Farquaad murders Mamma Bear from "Goldilocks And The Three Bears"
This is one of the more brutal DreamWorks deaths that almost nobody mentions. In the first Shrek film, Farquaad captures the Three Bears but Papa Bear and Baby Bear escape.
Sadly, Mama Bear isn't so lucky and is turned into a throw rug to adorn Farquaad's bed chamber.
The fact that Lord Farquaad's name is actually a play on a very dirty word/term.
Try saying his name over and over again as fast as you can; nothing yet? OK then, let's try sounding it out phonetically: FAHk-WAHd.
A piece of advice, be aware of who's around you when you start saying this aloud.
When Lord Farquaad gets a noticeable erection while looking at Fiona through the Magic Mirror.
If you pay attention during the scene, Farquaad sheepishly looks down and rearranges his blankets.
I didn't even mention the fact that he's drinking a martini while doing so. It makes me want to shudder just thinking about it.
The clear marijuana reference in *Shrek The Third*.
When Shrek, Donkey, and Puss in Boots arrive at the boarding school in search of their future king, they pass by a carriage resembling an old VW bus.
As the kids stumble out of the van in a cloud of smoke, the one turns to the other and says "Don't burn all my frankincense and myrrh."
Robin Hood likes to get laid in *Shrek*.
When Robin Hood and his Merry Men are singing their song to Shrek and Fiona, Robin sings "I like an honest fight and a saucy little maid."
To which his Merry Men reply "What he's basically saying is he likes to get --" and at that moment Robin interjects with the word "Paid!"
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Source: https://diply.com/6487151/10-moments-proving-shrek-was-really-not-for-kids
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